Repentance

I've been thinking a lot about repentance lately. I took a class when I was going to college at the Institute of Religion in Orem Utah called repentance and forgiveness and I learned so much about repentance, and it changed repentance for me. I always thought of repentance and thought it was a horrible, painful thing to do. But after taking that class I had a different opinion of repentance. I came to see repentance as a wonderful, beautiful thing. Repentance is turning our will over to Christ, changing our heart. I love ASL, and the sign for repentance is change with an R shaped hand. Repentance is change. Changing our will and our hearts to match that of God is not painful, the sins we have committed that pulled us away from Christ are what bring the pain and the sorrow. In life we do things that pull us away from Christ, they make us sad, and as they build up we end up farther and farther away from Christ. He loves us no matter what though and is just waiting for us to return to Him. See, He knows what will make us the most happy! It's His gospel! It brings so much joy and peace and happiness! But our sins don't. They bring us down and make us dismal and bring despair. To stop in our tracks and decide to follow Christ again is not painful, it's not hard to make that move. It is hard to overcome the sins that we have committed though, and it can be hard to overcome the addictions or temptations that we have succumbed to. What gives us hope though is the Atonement of Christ. He loves us so much, He is willing to struggle and suffer with us to help us get through and come out bright and clean again. The trick then is to not do those things again which pulled us away from Christ and stay close to Him. That again is not easy, but can be easier if we use, again, the Atonement of Christ. I like to think of returning to our Heavenly Father in an analogy, maybe like a parable. Heavenly Father lives in a huge white house, glowing white. White carpet everywhere, white couches, white everything. In front of God's house is a huge muddy field, there is no way to get to the house without going through that muddy field, you have to really want to get there. But you get dirty because you trip sometimes and you find a pocket of mud you didn't see and get stuck in. God's not going to let you in if you're all dirty, so how are you going to get in? He wants you to come in, and so do you, or else you wouldn't have walked through all the mud, but you can't come in dirty. Answer: Christ is standing outside with a hose. Asking Him to clean you off is the change of heart that is repentance. The scrubbing that comes from the mud is hard and can take time, and can be painful, but changing your heart and deciding to become clean again is the easy part. Every day we're repenting of something or another, big things, small things. The other night I was having a hard time going to sleep so I started to knit, something I like to do that allows me to think, and I was thinking about why I chose to come out on my mission. I realized I was able to repent when I made the choice. I said no to a mission, but God said yes. When I gave up what I wanted to do and decided to follow Christ, accept His will for me, I changed my heart and was able to repent. God knows what is best for me, He knows what will bring me joy, He knows what will prepare me for the rest of my life. I am glad that I was able to turn my will over to His in this choice because it is whats best for me, it is bringing me joy, and it is preparing me for so many things to come in life. It's hard to overcome sin, but it's easy to make the choice to come closer to Christ. 2 Nephi 31:20